exam days

well, its been hectic for this week with exams. paper after paper. I've been spending time with jo and kl. So its been fun being crazy with them. I've finally moved on. I've deleted his number, removed him from my friends list on fb and im not hurting right now. Nah, im fine right now. Coming up is geog and poa tomorrow. Then there'll be no counting. Yippee !!!

 But there'll be formulaes after formulaes stuck in my head. Pfft. :(
haix. damn. have been snacking on unhealthy snacks for the past three days. i so wanna go to gym but alaways procastinating. damn. hmm. well, that's life. always delaying when you need to do something. will end up not doing at all. playing fb now. gonna study when i get home later. prepare for rayer outing with skaters clique and mel tomorrow. gotta practice poa ten year series. haix. gotta go. chiao :)

"Show me where it hurts and I know that I can be the medicine you need and I’ll be your cure. I can see she left you with your heart wide open but I can be your shelter when the rain starts pouring. So don’t be afraid, I know I’m strong enough, to carry yours through. I’ll be your hero in my shining armor, just let me protect you, that’s what I’m here for. My love is the healer, don’t let me leave you. I promise I’ll be your cure.”"

mad like f***

Now life like shit. Tomorrow's gonna be crazy. I'm going crazy staring at his profile again and again. What is it about him that i can't seem to let go? What made me go crazy even at the sound of his name mentioned? I don't know. it hurts that he's just within reach but i can't seem to be able to touch him and hold on to him.

It's been tough since the start of the year. I was hoping for twist of tales but unfortunately things don't go my way. I've been trying my best in everything. But when it comes to relationship wise, i just totally give up. I don't wat anyone close, don't want them to know me. Cause once they know me, they always hurt me. It sucks to be in my shoes. Living a frigiin' life of pretense and living up to everyone's expectations, not being able to be free enough to live my life the way i want it.

I want this to end. Real soon. But i feel like i don't deserve a chance to step out of this life. Like it's already a part of me i can't seem to throw away. I feel like changing, once again. Like i want to run away from all these pain.

disappointing

The day started with o level results and definitely didn't meet my expexctations. Its like disappointing cause cikgu says so and she expected a lot more. haix. but whatever,gonna retake. so, striving for the best !!

random pics. nothing better to do so camwhored. pfft. bored to death siarh. well, he's gone already. want him out out out of my life. no more boys larh. give up, give up. gotta focus on my studies and next, my carrer. i won't die without a guy. so, haix. gotta go chiong fnn.

Argh !! Stress !!

I didn't have enough sleep. I didn't have enough rest at all. The day was spent doing my coursework. Last night, i borrowed thati's laptop and managed to finish up everything except conclusion, till i fell asleep. God, that was so tiring. I slept at like around 5 plus and wake up at around 7. haix. Tired Now, im finishing my poa papaer. Go home later, study and maybe read the book,'Ransom My Heart' that i borrowed last week and still have not read past half of the book.

Pfft. He's totally given up now. Good, that's wad i wanted him to do. To walk away and leave me now rather than later. His FB is filled with food so i guess he's fine without me the way im am witout him too. So, i better go right now and chiong poa !!! Bye peeps !!!

thank you

Tahnk you for being there but i see no poingt in hoping. Just walk away and avoid him. Im good people. Some people talked tome. Things are getting crazy and i need to chillax. I gotta focus on my studies. Remember the 6 !!!

 Im feeling better than i felt this morning. So, don't worry peeps. Tonight, im so studying maths algebra and combined humans. Need to touch my chemistry textbook after two days, Jiayou !!!

don't stress so much !!!

i don't want to get dependent on him. I've been hurting myself too much. Expecting something from nothing at all. Bitch, you gotta wake up and focus on your studies! O levels and all the friggin exams are coming so, delete his number. Don't give a fuck about wad he said. You have to stop thinking about him. Remember your goals ain and strive the best for yourself.

If he doesn't wait for you till your o levels, its okay. Move on and get someone else. If you have aced your o's, you could live freely. Have a life without a boyfriend. You can totally live with it.